Everyone has something to say, something to express. For some people they arrive with everything needed to speak from a podium. For others, it is a long, arduous journey to even get to the stage, much less the microphone. There are societal obstacles to overcome, negative beliefs to turn off, and a history of being silenced that needs to be healed. I am writing this for those of us who have struggled and denied their truths for a purpose other than ourselves.
It took me a long time to recover my voice and it is still in recovery. The truths I expressed so naturally as a child and even as a teenager were so difficult to express as an adult. What was it about the in between years that made my sense of self disappear? The stress, the mounting responsibilities, the politics of a workplace, the realization of a bigger, scarier world? The chaos of it all shifted my big voice into silence. Quieting my mouth became a survival tool because it at least guaranteed peace, even if short-lived. How many times have we silenced ourselves with, "Never mind, not worth it," before speaking what we desperately needed to express?
The work that I had to go through to allow myself to express my deep down thoughts, feelings, ideas, and opinions was difficult. It was easier to express nothing than to challenge a differing opinion, risk a relationship, or face the changes I needed to ignite. This path, however, led to nothing but turmoil. Eventually holding in my truths felt like a prison. I was caging myself in. My body had to fall apart before I accepted that I needed to free my truths.
My truth was that I needed to honor my creative, independent self. I had jammed myself into a stable, consistent, self-sacrificing life. But deep down is a wild child who dances to the beat of her own drum. In abandoning my love of freedom, books, writing, singing, dancing, mysteries, and adventure, I was suffocating myself. The moment I let go of what wasn't my truth was the day I came to life again.
All of my clients have expressed in some way the denial of their truth. Oftentimes, unlocking the truth is the first step in my line of work; it is the knot that unravels the whole net. Your truth is the root of you. Uncover it, water it, and watch yourself grow past the forest line. Once you're there, in a podium among the clouds, scream at the top of your lungs into the infinite sky, "I am free to be me!" Because you are. The moment you let yourself be, is the moment you are free. It's time to let go and untie the chains that have held us back for much too long.
Once you know your truth, your perspective changes, the crowd opens up, and the path to your podium is clear. The hardest part comes next. Take a step toward it. And keep walking. You will have to fight your own thoughts every time you make a move. But keep marching. Muster all of your courage, step up to the podium, and speak. You've fought so hard to get there. What are you going to say? What is your truth?
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